Don't know why I do this anymore...

I thought that if time went by, you'd realise how much I loved you. But I'm just deceiving myself. You don't care. You don't care what I think. You know me so well but you don't know that I love you.

You call me when you're drunk, and despite my parents disapproving, I still come out to drive you home no matter how late or far. I've never said no. I always think of you first, even if I have $1 in my pocket, I want to spend it on you. When something funny happens, I tell you first, even the things closest to my heart, I share with you and no one else.

But what do you do for me?

You call me when you want, you find me when you need. What's in it for me?
You tell me when you meet someone, how you think they're attractive, how you ask for their number, ask them out.

What about me?

It seems as though I'm that girl that you'll go to when you feel like it.
I'm so tired, I can't pretend to be okay with it anymore.

Eventually the flame that burns so brightly for you will die out. And so will I...

Is it because I'm always here that you take me for granted?
Because whenever you need me, I'm always around?
I sometimes think what if? What if one day I just disappeared. One day you would no longer be able to see me, find me. Would you miss me then? Or would you simply brush it off and move on with your life? Would it make you feel that perhaps I did matter?

I don't know anymore. I'm too tired to hold on to this hope, or what's left of it...
One day, when the time is right, I'll say my goodbye. forever.

Forever...?

I know so clearly that we are just what we are, and nothing more.
I asked him the other night on the phone,

me: anhiee, do you think we'll still be able to talk on the phone every night when you have a girlfriend?

him: of course, if shes my girlfriend, she'll know the connection we have.

me: but what if she is jealous, and doesn't let us talk on the phone?

him: no, if she's jealous, i don't want her. We'll have our phone calls foreverr!

me: forever...? nothing lasts forever...


That is the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me, forever huh...but even if I wanted to, even if your future girlfriend is okay with us talking, I'm afraid I won't have the courage, the ability, to see you happy with her, and I won't be able to do anything about it, I'll just have to sit and wish you happiness.

The more I see of you, the harder I fall.
One day, when you come to me with the news I don't want to hear.
I just might fall so hard and never wake to see the light again.

Just to be with you...

I go out of my way to spend more time with you, going home with you. It's our only time we can spend together, even though I know it takes even longer, I still choose to do so.
Just to be with you
We were driving the other night, and we were talking about the previous person I liked, I accidentally said that I liked you. You laughed and said oh really? why thank you...
But infact, what I said was true.